I’m going to share something with you that I’m quite sure is fairly common, albeit it’s still taboo: There are days when I do absolutely nothing, and about this I give absolutely zero fux! Now, I have to tell you I heard this concept (how to stop giving a fuc) a while ago listening to Sarah Knight, a former publishing editor turned entrepreneur who successfully used this view to radically change and improve her life. I’d been indulging in nothingness with zero guilt for years and here was someone putting it ever so profoundly into words—it was validation and I was impressed!
As for this nothingness– let us define what that actually means. There are days which come in no particular order and more often than not unforeseen, when the best I can bring myself to accomplish are keeping my kids alive, fed, out of harms way, (which includes each other’s cross hairs) and where I stay magnetically close to my bed. What that actually looks like in real time—well, that all depends. Sometimes it looks like pajamas all day and left-over dinner for breakfast; maybe I okay ice cream for lunch followed by a cartoon marathon with kids sprawled all over my bed. It looks like not one load of laundry done (imagine the pile even after a day in a household of 7) and my husband walking in from a long day’s work to a house that’s an utter mess. It can look like any or all of those things, still, when it does, I feel no guilt.
Don’t get me wrong, I used to give many fux (as Sarah would say)—as a stay at home mother and full-time wife, I looked at those days as personal failures, then I’d feel disappointed in myself and ashamed. Still, in spite of the guilt, there were times when I needed those days just to keep my head from imploding and following in the word’s of Forest Gump’s infamous Jenny and going “Far, far away”! I’d had five children, each approximately two years apart, I nursed each of them for a minimum of a year, I homeschooled them all, I did all the cooking, the majority the cleaning, and with my husband’s occupation there periods when I was the only parent my kids would see.
Those days of doing nothing, were at times, my only reprieve, so I learned to appreciate them. As for the laundry, the phone, the dishes, the cooking , the cleaning and whatever other things that do not absolutely have to be done, when I need to I let them go for my the greater good of my sanity, and I continue to give zero fux!